Jackie Meretsky

I often hear people saying that warmer climates bring simpler and less expensive lifestyles. Having lived in the north east for most of my life, I have definitely bought my fair share of winter coats over the years and with the boots craze this year in NYC, I still haven't found a storage unit in my building to fit the myriad of wedges, flats and stilettos I accumulated. Like clockwork, just when you think you've got the right combination of sweaters, boots and coats - the fashion magazines authoratively tell us what is in and what is out for spring and summer. Necklines plunge, hems raise and in short (pun obsessed today) less fabric becomes the rule.

Pending what could be a very active hurricane season, I hope to be spending most of my summer weekends in the Hamptons. I made the inaugural trip last weekend for the "unofficial start of summer" (that saying is almost as annoying as "April Showers bring May Flowers", but not as classic).

Ok, you can probably sense the underlying rip current of sarcasm, not to be confused with bitterness. It really stems (in keeping with the May flowers theme) with my recent bathing suit shopping experience. It seems to me that logically, less material would mean less expensive because of less fabric used.

With bathing suits, less fabric = more money. Go figure!

How wrong am I. It is immaterial (pardon the pun) for me to even begin to explain how frustrating bathing suit shopping is for all of womankind. Three way mirrors are unforgiving and if that doesn't frustrate you, then trying to tie your halter top up will. What is equally daunting is that the less material used in the construction of the swimming costume (which is what some of the elaborately adorned suits should be called), the more expensive they are.

A few factors that support my thesis:

1. I was shopping on the Upper East Side in Manhattan

2. I was looking for either white or brown, thus limited by the color selection

3. I only went to two bathing suit stores

I did manage to find something I liked, in Espresso brown, for approximately the price of a bottle of Roederer Cristal champagne (1999). Now all I have to find is a chic cover up in eyelet.