There was a time not long ago that Mr. Anderson Cooper was not inside the television machine, but instead there was a man who was talking about dogs who have jobs. Sometimes the job is about
having a nose that sniffs out things that are against the laws, and sometimes it is about having more fur than I do and coming and being strong for people who have fallen down in the snow rain.
I would not be good at that last one, but I hope very much that I can be good at the job that I am about to have to do, which is to be the Only Dog while Mr. Mordred is away having various items taken out of him. This is a very important job that involves being nice and being warm and being very next to people who are worried about the items inside Mr. Mordred, even though I have watched him a lot and have only seen delicious kibble and sometimes rice, chicken, and floor treats go in.
The job is also about if I see salty water on the faces of Daddy and Our Mommy Girl that I should go and kiss it off - not because it tastes good (which it does) but because it makes them smile and the salty water stops coming.
I think this is a job I can do.
xoxoYour Face-Kissing Friend Morgane
p.s. You can buy a very nice Cone Dog Lamp so you will never have to be scared by the boiler or the mop in the dark again.
Big, brave Mr. Mordred is not a pupcicle, but soon he will have to be wearing a cone anyway. I think he will look very delicious, just like this good dog in a picture by the most important artist in the history of ever, Mr. Brandon Bird. It is because of the opening up to look for things and then the putting back together that the Green Pajama Man will be doing soon, but I still say that I can tell them what exactly is in there. Maybe it is that people do not trust Whippets when they say things, because I have been tryingtryingtrying to tell everyone that if there is something inside Mr. Mordred that they wanted at one point, they probably don't want it any more.
As the day of my tummy surgery impends, I share with you a poem I have penned for my beloved Daddy. It will be included in the next publishing of my collection of poetical, hound-centric musings, "Heaves of Grass", and it is entitled:
A Poem to Amuse and Relieve My Daddy Upon the Soon Occasion of the Exploring of My Tummy by the Doctor in the Green Pajamas
I am a large wolfhound, ‘tis patently true
And when a large wolfhound feels rotten
It makes those around him so awfully blue
And good times are all but forgotten
I truly don’t mean to abandon my post
As watchdog of my family pack
You know I don’t care much to brag or to boast
But you’re safest when I have your back
But argue I can’t, with this yuck in my tummy
So to the nice doctor I’ll journey
He says that I’ll feel a good deal less crummy
Once they make me sleep on the gurney
Awake, I’ll be decked in a plastic cone collar
To keep me from nibbling my stitches
I will do my dog-darndest - not whine, cry or holler
No matter how badly it itches
I weather these things ‘cause I want for you, Father
To not have to worry or fret
I’ll soon be much stronger – eschew all the bother
I’m surely not done with you yet
Sometimes when Mr. Mordred is having his eyes-shut time (which he would say is never of the time, but I would say is a lot of the time), I can hear and see with my Whippet eyes and ears that he is moving and making small noises like he is thinking of things that are probably squirrels and probably about the chasing of them.
I cannot say for sure what it is that I am thinking of when I am making those sounds and moves while I am sleeping – mostly because I am asleep while they are happening, but I think it is probably also squirrels, Mr. Anderson Cooper, and cheese, because those are the things that I am thinking about when I am not asleep. Sometimes Mr. Anderson Cooper is feeding cheese to the squirrels, and sometimes cheese is feeding Mr. Anderson Cooper to the squirrels. Those are the thoughts I do not like as much, and probably when those happen is when you hear me make the sad noises.
Hi nice friends,
Gentle Readers,
